My hands clench the steering wheel. Tears start to mount behind my eyes, further blurring my already foggy focus.
My shaking hand reaches for the radio instinctively, and I find the nearest parking lot to pull into, breathing myself back into the real world.
I’ve been down this road before. This is driving anxiety – not simple nerves, but a gripping fear that can make people avoid roads entirely.
There’s a difference between just being a nervous driver and those living on the far end of this spectrum.
In rural Texas, where walking isn’t always an option, that avoidance can pose a real barrier. Driving in areas like this isn’t always a choice, but rather a necessity, to survive.
For some, driving comes naturally.
Well, as natural as it can be for operating a two-ton hunk of metal travelling at incredible speeds, surrounded by other cars doing the same thing.
For others, anxiety around operating a vehicle doesn’t fade with age or even experience. The car can feel like an alien planet – somewhere we aren’t meant to be. The causes of driving anxiety are many: generalized anxiety, somatic responses from past trauma, overexposure to road rage and aggression, or other causes.
Sometimes it stems from a need for control. Whatever the origin, the experience is real, and it leads to people feeling unsafe on the road.
What does driving anxiety look like?
- Physically: racing heart, sudden sweating, tunnel vision, nausea, trembling hands or legs
- Behaviorally: avoiding highways or “tough” areas, relying on others for rides, cancelling plans, second guessing yourself at every turn
- Cognitively: catastrophic thoughts (“I’m definitely going to hit someone!”), dissociation (“I’m not really here right now”), or chronic hypervigilance (“Something bad is absolutely going to happen”).
Why It Happens
These are just some of the potential underlying causes of driving anxiety. Everyone’s experience looks different.
- Generalized anxiety: A mind that already races with anxiety at everyday interactions can find being behind the wheel of a car paralyzingly overwhelming. When everything feels like a threat, of course operating a ‘deadly vehicle’ might, too.
- Trauma: People who have experienced a crash or witnessed a horrific assault behind the wheel may be more reluctant to drive because of residual trauma from past experiences. This can also be true for survivors of violence, especially if one’s abuser used driving as a means of control or intimidation.
- Road rage and aggressive driving: if a person is constantly surrounded with honking, yelling, cursing, tailgating, or menacing behavior from fellow drivers, they may find themselves less comfortable being around them, let alone operating a vehicle.
- Control and OCD-linked fears: For some, this sense of unpredictability triggers compulsive worries and furthers avoidant tendencies.
Especially in rural towns, driving anxiety can directly upset a person’s everyday life, in ways that are hard to explain to someone who’s never experienced it themselves.
Anxious drivers risk missing medical appointments, dates, and even work shifts. In the end, they miss the one thing that may help them the most to overcome their fears – community.
Practical, Trauma-Informed Strategies
The goal is not to suddenly be the most confident driver on the road – it’s to sustainably build driving self-confidence and comfort.
Every victory matters, even the smallest ones!
In the moment grounding
- Box breathing (or paced breathing): Inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, and exhale for 4 seconds. Repeat this process until your breathing slows and you start to feel calmer.
- Grip-and-release: squeeze your hands tightly around the wheel for five seconds, then relax them fully. This can help relieve built up tension in the body.
- Keep a comfort object around that you can touch to “come back down to earth” if you start to feel like you are drifting into anxiety or dissociation.
- Pull over when needed: safety first. No need to rush. Turn off the engine, practice your grounding, and resume driving when you feel ready.
At this point, you can call a trusted person to walk you through the next steps if needed.
Preparation
- Map your routes ahead of time. Consider using Street View to visually familiarize yourself with the roads before driving – especially if you are in a new area.
- Practice driving during off-peak hours, when the roads are less busy and there are fewer potential distractions or triggers.
- Create a safety plan: Talk to a trusted person, agreeing to check-in times and plan to call them if you end up needing to pull over.
- Bring water, have your favorite driving playlist preset and ready to go before you start driving, and put your phone on silent to avoid distractions.
Therapy and Professional Coaching
- Graded exposure: work with a licensed professional if possible to build up your comfort levels behind the wheel over time.
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): address panic, avoidance, and other behavioral effects of driving anxiety
- Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR): target underlying trauma-related thought patterns
- Driving courses: work with a professional driving teacher to build up experience and comfort.
- Peer support groups: connect with others who understand the challenges of driving anxiety. This can be validating and help reduce shame.
A Final Note to the Reader with Driving Anxiety
You are not broken. There is nothing wrong with you. And you are not alone. Driving anxiety is real, common, and treatable. What feels safe to your neighbor might not feel safe to you, and that’s okay.
Maybe our town needs more sidewalks and safer bike lanes so fewer people must choose between feeling safe and feeling stranded… that’s a civic conversation worth having. But for now, start with small steps, trust your instincts, and have patience with yourself. You deserve to feel safe as you move around the world. Everyone does.
Suggested Journaling Prompt: Where in my life do I feel the safest? What is one small way I can bring that feeling of safety with me on the road the next time I find myself behind the wheel?
Resources for Readers
- West Texas Counseling and Guidance – 36 E Twohig
- Angelo Driving Academy – 400 W Ave N.
- Texas Workforce Commission Driver Education Funding Program – https://www.twc.texas.gov/programs/driver-education-funding-program
